I love this poem because it took me a long time to find my voice. It took me even longer to learn how to convey my points of view while taking those of others into consideration. I was once told that I demand respect from others but I was not so willing to grant it. I know I am not alone. Many people struggle to find their voice and there are many different reasons why.
I know that as a woman, we are often taught that standing up for ourselves makes us that b-word. Even worse, we are deemed as overly emotional or unstable. As a black woman, the situation is often worse. When we do speak out, we are many times labeled as angry and bitter. We become silenced by these toxic stereotypes. We become afraid to be our true selves.
Some people are going to like or love you and some people are going to hate or dismiss you. The most important thing is that you like and love yourself. As long as you're not mistreating another person, then their opinion of you can not matter more than your own.
It took me a while, but I own who I am. Though it's not always pretty or what I'd like to see, it is me. It is honestly and authentically me. We only live once. We get just this single spin on planet Earth being the person that we are. Own yourself. Enjoy yourself. Be true to yourself.
I did not blog this week as you can see.
Hang with me though!
I've been working on something special that I hope to post soon! Thank you! Be Blessed and BE a Blessing!
Splinters, those nasty little pieces of wood or other barely visible materials that get stuck under our skin and reek all matters of havoc. Sometimes we feel them as they penetrate our skin. Other times we do not. We may only become aware that the splinter is there because something else agitates the affected area. Thus, the first sign that the formerly unnoticed splinter is there might be the pain we feel.
Traumas that pain our souls are similar to the splinters that cause pain in our bodies.
Whether seen or not, a splinter left in our skin will not only continue to cause us pain but can lead to an infection that adversely impacts the rest of our bodies. With any splinter, it must be properly removed, thoroughly cleaned, and nursed to a point of complete healing.
Why the lecture on splinters? Traumas that pain our souls are similar to the splinters that cause pain in our bodies. Although the steps are basically the same, those required to recover from trauma may not always seem as clear as the steps required to recover from splinters.
Many people will urge us to simply move on from our traumas. They forget the crucial step of taking care of the wound. Not properly removing and caring for the wound left by a splinter is like not fully dealing with trauma. We may try to move on from our issues but when not properly dealt with, our issues will not move on from us.
The process of removing the splinter can be just as painful as the splinter itself.
Because we didn't properly address what splintered us, the splinter and its inevitable effects are left to fester. Though the process of removing the splinter can be just as painful as the splinter itself, we must persist and get the job done. We have to apply pressure to the problem area in hopes that enough of the splinter will poke out so we can grab a hold of it. When removing the splinter, we can't use just any old pair of tweezers; they must be sterile.
Sometimes, we correctly remove the splinter but fail to clean the wound. An unclean open wound can lead to a more disastrous infection than the original splinter itself. Sometimes, the splinter is correctly removed and disinfected but the tiny area is not given the time or protection it needs to properly close and is, therefore, susceptible to still more pain.
There is purpose in dealing with our pains.
Healing from life traumas is a process just like healing from a splinter. Don't make the same terrible mistakes I've made. Many times, I pretended the trauma wasn't there, that it didn't exist. I allowed it to fester and I exposed it to other irritants. We as humans tend to want to power through our problems instead of dealing with them. We don't like admitting when and where we are weak or vulnerable.
Know that just like splinters, our spiritual traumas, if not properly addressed, will continue to haunt us. Don't allow pressure from others or a desire to quickly return to normalcy, cause you to rush your healing process. There is purpose in dealing with our pains. We must thoroughly remove the remnants if we are to be free from their consequences.
I want to help uplift, inspire and empower others and to help leave the world a little better than I found it. I am an author, deep thinker & optimist. I know God is love. I am the author of "Candidreams: I Remember the Beginning" and "Role Reversal: Turn Pain Into Power".
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Featuring original artwork by Ran H.