I believe there is only one God. God and His ways are sometimes a mystery but there is one thing I know for certain. I know that I am not Him. Knowing this, why do I sometimes insert myself into His place? Why do I sometimes try to handle His business for Him? Why do I every so often, try to snatch the reins?
Once I am certain of God's instructions, I can't be afraid to act on them.
It took me longer than I'd like to admit to recognize and accept God's vision for me. As a flawed human being, I still experience times when my faith in that vision is tested because it's taking too long for my vision to blossom into full fruition. I trust God through and through. However, there are times when I am unsure if I am playing my part in receiving His blessings. I sometimes wrestle with when I should do more and when I should wait. I struggle with trusting myself to get it right.
We are encouraged in the Bible that through God, we have the power and authority to conquer and overcome. We are told that we have been blessed with love, power, and a sound mind and that we were not given the spirit of fear. Those and many other teachings illustrate to me that it is vital that I do my part. Once I am certain of God's instructions, I can't be afraid to act on them.
I've never been one to sit around and wait for things to happen. I work extremely hard and I am thoroughly dedicated to my goals. I go the extra mile. I take the extra steps and I put forth the extra effort. I sometimes push myself past the point of exhaustion leaving myself overwhelmed and anxious. I get so worked up about whether I'm working hard enough to accomplish certain goals, that I lose the joy of laboring for God.
I become my own worst enemy with my ceaseless self-doubt.
When what you're striving for so unrelentingly still feels far away, it is very human and very easy to start questioning yourself. I am constantly asking myself if I've done enough. Have I done absolutely everything in my power? Am I experiencing slow, if any results because I neglected some aspect of God's guidance? Is this really what God planned for me or did I only convince myself that I was aligned with Him? I become my own worst enemy with my ceaseless self-doubt.
On the other hand, we are also assured in the Bible that we should wait on the Lord. It is made clear that He and He alone is God. I know that to be true. There is nothing anyone can tell me to disbelieve God. I've learned that once I've done all in my power that can be done, that I should wait on Him.
Unfortunately, I've learned this the hard way. There were many times when I acted prematurely against my own interests because I needed to make something happen. I needed to see some movement or progress. I impatiently required tangible proof that my efforts were leading me in the desired direction. Many of those times, in my rash decision making, I made a mess of things.
So here I am, looking at two sides of the same coin. On one side, I am to wait patiently for God's answers. On the other, I'm supposed to do it myself with what God has already given me. How do I avoid acting too fast when I should be waiting? How do I not just sit there waiting when there is something more I could do? What do I do? How do I avoid sleepless nights brought on by my mind's constant circling of these questions?
I don't need to know the specifics of God's every reasoning.
The answer for me is keeping close to God. I am in constant communication with Him. Sometimes, I even verify that I'm properly connected even if there is nothing particular I need or want at the moment. I conduct a proverbial mic check to ensure our line is still open and secure.
I make time for God in the morning and in the evening each day; nothing else, no TV, no music, no phone, no one else, just me and Him. I also talk to Him throughout the day. I am not embarrassed to say it, to call myself needy but when it comes to God, I admit that I am always in need of His guidance and closeness. So when life questions arise, the lines of communication are already open and I receive His message easier and clearer than those times when I would pray to Him only when I needed something.
Actively seeking so much closeness to God may seem intense to some but life is intense. Life comes at you fast and I have a God who is able and willing to help me address my concerns and handle my problems. There are many reasons why we should sometimes wait and other times, we should act.
I don't need to know the specifics of God's every reasoning. I don't require certainty on my future outcomes. What I do need is to know that God is with me and leading me in the right direction. I need to know I can call on Him at any time for His comfort and support and to answer any of those wait or don't wait questions. Those needs and every other need of my life, God has mercifully and lovingly met.
I want to help uplift, inspire and empower others and to help leave the world a little better than I found it. I am an author, deep thinker & optimist. I know God is love. I am the author of "Candidreams: I Remember the Beginning" and "Role Reversal: Turn Pain Into Power".
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Featuring original artwork by Ran H.